Voici 100 choses que les GAYS font au moins une fois dans leur vie

Les homosexuels sont-ils si différents des autres ?

Nous avons mené une grand enquete internationale durant les derniers mois. Tout ceci est trés sérieux, voici donc 100 choses que les personnes gays vont faire au moins une fois dans leur vie.

gif-gay
Crédit : Giphy

 

1. Manger

 

2. Boire

 

3. Dormir

 

4. Faire des soirées entre amis et terminer minable

 

5. Se disputer avec son conjoint

 

6. Regarder la télé

 

7. Surfer sur des sites inutiles

 

8. Faire du shopping

 

9. Faire l’amour

 

10. Se faire chier au repas de mémé

 

11. Rigoler

 

12. Picoler

 

13. Conduire des voitures, scooter, skates etc.

 

14. Faire des études

 

15. Lire des magazines pourris chez le dentiste

 

16. Lire des livres

 

17. Passer des coups de fil

 

18. Remplir de la paperasse administrative en million d’exemplaires 

 

19. Se doucher avec du gel douche

 

20. Aller faire des courses et attendre derrière la mémé qui paie encore en francs

 

21. Réfléchir à la vie et se demander si les cacas d’yeux ont un nom scientifique

 

22. Pleurer

 

23. Mater des séries

 

24. Faire du sport et quand même être essoufflé au bout de 4 étages

 

25. Commenter une vidéo YouTube

 

26. Regarder sur un forum comment réparer un bug de Windows 10 après installation

 

27. Envoyer un e-mail et se rendre compte d’une faute d’orthographe à la dernière minute

 

28. Donner des nouvelles à ses grand-parents et regretter quand pépé vous raconte sa vie

 

29. S’endormir en regardant la télé

 

30. Galérer en enfilant sa housse de couette

 

31. Marcher dans la rue (sauf quand il/elle est en fauteuil, dans ce cas-la il roule)

 

32. Marcher dans un appartement (après avoir marché dans la rue)

 

33. Poster des photos sur Facebook

 

34. Se mettre en équilibre sur sa chaise

 

35. Voyager

 

36. Prendre le train et et se prendre la tête avec la SNCF/RATP par la même occasion

 

37. Nettoyer ses lunettes (pour ceux qui ont des lunettes)

 

38. Se plaindre de la chaleur (ou du froid selon la saison)

 

39. Manger des gâteaux

 

40. Coller des post-it

 

41. Se réveiller le matin et se rendormir encore 5 minutes

 

42. Aller aux toilettes

 

43. Faire caca

 

44. Faire pipi

 

45. Faire popo

 

46. Se brosser les dents

 

47. Se brosser les cheveux

 

48. Consulter Wikipédia pour savoir comment s’appelle un caca d’oeil

 

49. Se masturber

 

50. Coudre (pour ceux qui cousent)

 

51. Cligner des yeux

52. Chanter

 

53. Naître

 

54. Mourir

 

55. Mettre des vêtements

 

56. Enlever ses vêtements (en fin de journée ou pas seulement…)

 

57. Aller chez le médecin (pour ceux qui sont malades)

 

58. Renifler

 

59. Aimer

 

60. Péter

 

61. Se gratter (quand ça gratte)

 

62. Dire “tiens il faut que je passe à la poste” et regretter une fois dans la queue

 

63. Penser “tiens je sais que j’oublie quelque chose mais je me rappelle plus quoi”

 

64. Transpirer

 

65. Envoyer des textos

 

66. Se nourrir

 

67. Avoir des cheveux qui poussent (salut à nos amis les chauves)

 

68. Se marier

 

69. Chercher un autre job

 

70. Sursauter quand LA BASE VIRALE VPS A ÉTÉ MISE A JOUR (merci AVAST)

 

71. Se plaindre du temps qu’il fait

 

72. Être dans la lune

 

73. Changer de forfait de téléphone

 

74. Rêver d’un avenir meilleur

 

75. Poser sa démission

 

76. Allumer la lumière (quand il fait noir)

 

77. Bronzer

 

78. Se faire spoiler et se venger ensuite

 

79. Se frotter les yeux de fatigue

 

80. Dire “salut ça va ?” à un pote

 

81. Acheter un maillot de bain pour l’été

 

82. Se regarder dans le miroir

 

83. Se renseigner sur des trucs

 

84. Parler à haute voix

 

85. Chuchoter quand c’est délicat de parler à haute voix

 

86. Ramasser un truc qui est tombé par terre

 

87. Ouvrir une porte à l’aide d’une clé

 

88. Dévisser un bouchon afin de boire dans une bouteille

 

89. Descendre les poubelles

 

90. S’allonger sur son lit

 

91. Cliquer sur la croix rouge en haut à droite d’une fenêtre pour la fermer (ou en haut à gauche pour les meilleurs #TMTC)

 

92. Regarder l’heure le matin

 

93. Regarder l’heure l’après-midi

 

94. Perdre du temps sur les réseau sociaux

 

95. Entendre

 

96. Être content de recevoir de l’argent

 

97. Serrer la main en guise de salutation

 

98. Ne pas se laver les mains en sortant des toilettes (mais se les laver parfois quand même quand y’a du monde qui regarde)

 

99. Sourire à un(e) inconnu(e) dans les transports en commun

 

100. Et parfois aussi ils pratiquent la sodomie et les lesbiennes, elles, font les ciseaux

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